{"title":"Nostalgia \/ Retro","description":"\u003cp\u003eBrowse our Nostalgia \/ Retro collection. Hot Sale.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"dont-do-bad-kids-tee","title":"Don't Do Bad Kid's Tee","description":"\u003ch2\u003eThe Lore\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCaptures the \u003cstrong\u003eearly 2010s\u003c\/strong\u003e era of ironic meme revival when religious parodies went viral across Tumblr and Vine. The crude black ink sketch paired with that rainbow gradient signature creates the exact visual chaos of bootleg evangelical imagery mixed with modern absurdism. Wearing this proves you reject sad beige aesthetics and possess the chaotic internet-literate humor that values \"so bad it's good\" over traditional curation. For those who remember when DIY meme tees dominated social feeds and Buddy Christ derivatives were peak shareable content.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Specs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBase:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eRabbit Skins 3321\u003c\/strong\u003e is Engineered for sensitive skin with fine jersey smoothness, built tough enough to survive toddler chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Lightweight 153 GSM (4.50 oz) 100% combed ring-spun cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrint Tech:\u003c\/strong\u003e Kornit NeoPigment™ DTG—Oeko-Tex® certified eco-inks are jetted directly into the fabric fibers, creating a soft, retail-grade print that withstands repeated washing without heavy buildup.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFeel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Ink settles soft like childhood crayon mistakes that became family legends. Breathes easy through playground adventures while broadcasting your commitment to beautifully chaotic parenting choices.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Standard toddler cut with side-seamed construction. Soft combed ring-spun cotton that handles countless washes. True to size. Battle-tested for active play.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Trust\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCPSIA Compliant · Tested Safe for Sensitive Skin · WRAP Certified · Eco-Certified Inks · \u003cstrong\u003eSweatshop-Free Production (US\/EU)\u003c\/strong\u003e · Made-to-Order (Zero Overproduction)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRating:\u003c\/strong\u003e PG · Absurdist · Family Safe\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVisual Accessibility:\u003c\/strong\u003e Set against a stark white backdrop, a playful, intentionally naive doodle is rendered in deep ink black marker style. The rough sketch depicts a floating man's head with wavy hair alongside uneven text reading \"Don't DO Bad\" (evoking a school notebook margin aesthetic). Beneath, a whimsical signature anchors the design in a crayon-like rainbow gradient of vivid magenta, sunshine yellow, and lime green.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shirtwascash","offers":[{"title":"Heather \/ 2","offer_id":49768783904920,"sku":"kur1788049587830","price":14.56,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather \/ 3","offer_id":49768783937688,"sku":"lkk1788049587831","price":14.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather \/ 4","offer_id":49768783970456,"sku":"cij1788049587832","price":12.57,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather \/ 5","offer_id":49768784003224,"sku":"pux1788049587833","price":14.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 2","offer_id":49768784035992,"sku":"mqa1788049587834","price":14.56,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 3","offer_id":49768784068760,"sku":"jvx1788049587835","price":12.17,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 4","offer_id":49768784101528,"sku":"yds1788049587836","price":13.17,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 5","offer_id":49768784134296,"sku":"hpv1788049587837","price":13.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2","offer_id":49768784167064,"sku":"spl1788049587838","price":13.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3","offer_id":49768784199832,"sku":"hyn1788049587839","price":14.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4","offer_id":49768784232600,"sku":"nwx1788049587840","price":12.97,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5","offer_id":49768784265368,"sku":"qce1788049587841","price":15.56,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0707\/1832\/4888\/files\/dont-do-bad-kids-tee_1.jpg?v=1788049592"},{"product_id":"cookie-wave-one-piece-swimsuit","title":"Cookie Wave One-Piece Swimsuit","description":"\u003ch2\u003eThe Lore\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eChannels the \u003cstrong\u003eearly 2010s internet\u003c\/strong\u003e mashup golden age when classic art met Sesame Street chaos. The midnight indigo wave morphs into that unmistakable shaggy silhouette with googly eyes—chocolate chip cookies tumbling in the foam instead of fishing boats. Wearing this proves you appreciate sophisticated absurdity and remember when meme culture first discovered Hokusai. For those who spent hours scrolling through viral art parodies and still quote puppet monsters while raiding the kitchen at 2am.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Specs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Dense-Knit 225 GSM (6.64 oz) 75% recycled polyester, 25% elastane.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrint Tech:\u003c\/strong\u003e Deep-Dyed Sublimation—ink uses high temperature vapor osmosis to bond directly with the fabric molecules for a zero-texture, breathable print that will never crack, peel, or fade.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFeel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Graphics feel weightless—colors bonded permanently into fabric that moves like water itself. Commands attention with the confident absurdity of someone who gets the joke and owns it completely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e A snug, form-fitting cut with a genuinely \"cheeky\" bottom and low scoop back. \u003cstrong\u003eSizing Note:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs short in the torso. Size up +1 if you are tall (5'7\"+) or have a long torso to prevent shoulder digging. Use the size chart based on your girth, but size up for height.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Trust\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOEKO-TEX® 100 · REACH Compliant · Zero-Wastewater Printing · \u003cstrong\u003eSweatshop-Free Production (US\/EU)\u003c\/strong\u003e · Made-to-Order (Zero Overproduction) · \u003cstrong\u003eFade-Resistant Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRating:\u003c\/strong\u003e PG · Absurdist Parody · Family Safe\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVisual Accessibility:\u003c\/strong\u003e A sandy biscuit beige background sets the stage for a whimsical parody of Japanese ukiyo-e woodblock art. The crashing white foam of a midnight indigo and slate blue wave morphs into a shaggy puppet monster (complete with maniacal googly eyes) staring from the surge. Realistic golden-brown chocolate chip cookies—replacing traditional fishing boats—toss about in the surreal, hunger-driven surf.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shirtwascash","offers":[{"title":"XS","offer_id":49768784363672,"sku":"kop1788049590774","price":34.72,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S","offer_id":49768784396440,"sku":"tor1788049590775","price":29.01,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":49768784429208,"sku":"byg1788049590776","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":49768784461976,"sku":"kme1788049590777","price":33.84,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":49768784494744,"sku":"dct1788049590778","price":29.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":49768784527512,"sku":"fqk1788049590779","price":34.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":49768784560280,"sku":"opi1788049590780","price":28.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0707\/1832\/4888\/files\/cookie-wave-one-piece-swimsuit_1.jpg?v=1788049595"}],"url":"https:\/\/www.candlewoodcorner.shop\/collections\/nostalgia-retro.oembed","provider":"My Store","version":"1.0","type":"link"}